You want to be happy and in love. You want to be in a healthy relationship. It doesn’t seem like too much to ask, yet your previous relationships weren’t the healthiest or happiest despite your love and best efforts. This sounds familiar? It doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with you or that you are unlovable. Rather than looking for outside confirmation, start looking inwards and learn to love yourself. If you work on yourself, you can attract the right partner and you will have a healthy and supportive relationship you always wanted.
What Does It Mean To Be In A Healthy Relationship
A healthy and happy relationship cannot exist without love, that’ for sure. However, other things matter too. Things such as respect, support, safety, and room to grow.
Life is all about relationships – romantic relationships, friendships, work relationships. It’s easy to put on a mask for a few hours at work or to hide your true colors from your friends but romantic relationships are more intimate and they reveal what we usually hide from the rest of the world. We’re more vulnerable in romantic relationships that’s why it’s important to have healthy relationships that cultivate love and create a peaceful and safe space for us. In order to do this, you have to love yourself and develop a healthy relationship with yourself first.
Why It Is Important To Love Yourself First
When you love yourself, you have more love to give. You radiate love and you are filled with positive emotions. When you don’t, you feel guilt, anger, shame, and self-doubt. All these negative emotions impact your intimate relationship, no matter how much you try to keep them inside.
How To Improve The Relationship You Have With Yourself
Start believing in yourself and in your ability to care for others. Low self-esteem and self-doubt affect the connection you have with others. On the other hand, embracing yourself and believing in yourself bring more joy and happiness. If you want to have healthy relationships, begin your self-love journey.
Know Yourself
Start looking at yourself and analyze your behavior. Discover your strengths and weaknesses and find out what makes people love you and what alienates them. Then ask yourself who you want to be and what’s valuable to you. Accept who you are and who you strive to be. Then start working on bettering yourself and becoming the best version of yourself. Do it by setting realistic goals and be kind and patient with yourself.
Know Your Worth
Contrary to popular belief, knowing your worth and communicating assertively doesn’t negatively impact the relationships you have with others. Quite the opposite. Seeking validation from others can damage relationships because people can see this behavior as egotistical if they don’t know your real reasons. Moreover, it can be tiring for them. Therefore, it’s perfectly ok to give yourself credit for your achievements and stop looking for outside confirmation of your worth.
Know Your Needs
Not all people like and want the same things. The key to a healthy relationship is finding someone who has the same goals in life as yourself. You don’t need to have everything in common with your significant other but it’s important to have the same long-term goals and needs. Someone who wants to get married and have children won’t be happy in a relationship with someone who doesn’t. No matter what, this type of relationship can’t be healthy because one partner has to give up their dreams to stay in the relationship. Eventually, this leads to resentment. It’s not selfish to know what you want and to ask for it. It’s better and healthier than pretending.